Helper

A very experienced and mature Indonesian helper, highly recommended by my relatives, bearing high hopes she will last for 2 years but repatriated after mere 1 month.

And so the story goes....

She was hired to care for my great grandmother. After about 1 month or so, the health of my great grandmother deteriorate rather badly and so the family decide the helper could not have managed to care for her anymore and she will be sent to a nursing home once she is fit for discharge (which by the way did not happen). Most of the family members spoke very well of her, responsible, clean, initiative, non calculative. So we thought since the 'testimonials' for her is so good, why not to give it a try. We interviewed her, shed some lights on her main job responsibilities, what is to be expected etc. We discussed about her handphone and she was very reluctant for us to keep her HP only to be return to her when we are back from work. We compromised a step further by telling her that she can hold her HP but she should only be using it after 7pm so she will not be distracted in the day helping to watch over the kids. We explained to her that we do not wish to blame her should the kids fall or hurt themselves thus she should really give it some thoughts if she is willing to work for our household. She agreed.

The paperwork was quite a hassle since we do not have certain facility at home and had to call for advice from MOM frequently. Finally work permit was approved and we fetched her home. The amount of luggage she hold was jaw dropping! She showed signs of displeasure when I told her to declare her cash and despite asking her a few times, she confirmed all the cash she had on her. The 1st 3 days went on really well, she settled in quickly, was fast in her chores yet reasonably clean, could cook rather well with minimum instructions. Even though she did not choose to follow my schedule and "time-table" for chores, I kept mum about it thinking as long as it's completed, fine. Then we noticed that she would shut herself in the bathroom for long periods of time e.g. 20mins and neither is she washing the toilet nor washing the laundry. I was worried fearing that she is unwell thus the frequent and prolong visits to the washroom. Took the chance to reinforce that should she be unwell, would have to inform us.

Just one week into the household, things turned for the worse. She will rush through her chores in the morning and disappear in the bathroom again for 30 minutes before we woke up. Gradually it become certain things left undone in the morning. She got more and more 'forgetful' and left more chores unattended. Random spot checks confirmed that some chores are not performed at all! The 1st sunday, she sterilized the bottles before Zelyn's last feed and went into the room to make phone calls. Not until we had to remind her about the last feed bottle, she appear in the kitchen. Reminded her of which she apologized and we did not take it to heart since it is really minor issue. Requested for her off day on the 2nd weekend which we allowed as it's for her birthday celebration and again we reminded her it's because of her birthday that we make it an exception hoping she will be appreciative. 

The 1st major issue appear on her off day. Returning her cash and work permit, she showed bad attitude at my request to check her belongings. Upon returning from her off day, she marched straight into the room. It was only 2 hours later that I asked for her work permit and cash. Because of her attitude, we requested to check her belongings too. We got to discover that she did not fully declare her valuables on her 1st day despite several reminders. I asked her again and again but she choose to keep mum about it and came up with some lame excuses. It was then one more handphone was discovered and she claimed that her aunty had just given it to her since her old phone is not working very well. Few days later I spoke to her about it and threaten her a little that I could have suspected that the money is not hers and reported her to the police as she is not supposed to have cash on her. She looked taken aback and was quick to apologize. I laid out the house rules and reinforced them again to her. I explained to her it's important to check her belongings as we are responsible on what is in our household. I cited an example what if there are drugs in her bag? Not that we do not trust her but assuming if strangers put it in her bag without her knowledge, all of us will be in hot soup. She was surprised to hear that and obviously this had never ever cross her mind before.

As the days went on, she was acting very secretive in the bathroom for longer period of time. When she hear us walking to the kitchen, she will act very suspiciously as though trying to hide something in her pocket. She tricked us by leaving an HP to charge in the room but we were highly suspicious she had another on her. We had wanted to close an eye to it but it escalate further. We tried to speak nicely to her on the slipshod chores performed. Never did once we reprimand her for anything but instead we focus on how a chore should be completed. One afternoon, my mum text me and asked to send her back. She caught her using her handphone in the bathroom! So apparently she had 3 handphones in total! I called up her agency to find out the procedures if we were to send her back. It sounded really ridiculous that even though there are no fees charge for food and lodging, if 30 days later she is still not hired, we would still need to pay for her air ticket back. Totally makes no sense as we would have to incur 1 month levy cost.

On the very night, we sat her down and talk to her again. We have decided to give her a last chance. If so she decide to continue working for us, then she will need to surrender her HP when we leave for work and we will only return to her after 7pm. Upon hearing that she is quick to decide that she would like to request for a transfer. I told her that there is no such option left as we do not wish to spend more money on her. By transfering her from our relative, she saved up on 1 mth salary but we had to pay for her. Told her right in the face that we helped her to save and yet she is making us pay more money for her. She did not seem to understand what is going on and reconfirmed that we had to pay more money to send her back to agent. We reminded her to think very carefully, she should only continue working for us only if she have the heart to, otherwise then we will definitely send her back to Yogjakarta. I supposed we are being very fair to her by offering another chance despite her attitudes and the wrongs she had done (of which she is really stubborn and refused to admit). We try to reason things out with her asking her to consider which is more important, earning keeps for her children or her insistence on holding her HP of which we are not unreasonable to keep totally, it's just a matter of having it only we are back from work so we could mind the children. We gave her a day to think it over.

The next day she told the hub that she wants to call it quits. We did not indicate to her when we will send her back and I have the intention to let her know only when it's time to pack and whisk off to the airport. Not going to give her time and opportunity to perform any tricks. The day of repatriation came and I told her to start her packing by bringing all her belongings out in the living room where my IP cam is. She is to turn the pockets of her clothings out to ensure nothing is hidden inside, the same goes to her many handbags and luggage. The most ridiculous question amid the packing was "excuse me mdm, am I going back to agent". Told her I have repeated myself many times that it's either work here or go back yogjakarta. Before she even attempt to protest, informed her it's too late as her work permit is cancelled so nothing could be done.

We were caught by surprise that she said her thank you to my mum before leaving the house and thank both of us at the airport. We taught her to keep different amount of cash at different places since it might not be safe in her hometown, even to the extend of try not to flash out too much cash when she reached her airport. The whole process was relatively smooth and we breathe our relief when her flight took off and we did not received any 'surprise call' around the departure time. 

A lesson to learn from this experience. We really need lots of luck for a better helper the next time, that's if we have the courage to hire another after the traumatizing and trying helpers episodes. Never will we allow future helper to have a HP, that would be the main criteria of the new helper. First and foremost, huge amount of courage is required before decision to hire another helper is firmed!